Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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