you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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