Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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