it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
