im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
