how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
There r osticjed everywhere
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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