i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Michael Bay diarrhea
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
it glows. i had to have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize