I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
