your parents love me but you hate me
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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