yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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