his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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