I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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