i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Swine flu is the new snow day.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
