How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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