He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
