Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
