it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
