It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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