i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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