I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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