so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
