summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize