Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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