uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
