He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize