Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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