Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
