Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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