He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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