Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
