He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize