If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
