I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
You're so nebulous sometimes
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
