is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
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