Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
