my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I booty called her while she was in labor.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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