how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
