Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize