i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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