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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
