How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
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