Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
