i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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