32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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