I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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