Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize