Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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