if you like me you must not know who I am
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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