This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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