OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Panties = found
Randomize
