I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
