So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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