paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
